Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Good luck, Alan

Perennial presidential candidate Alan Keyes has added a new notch to his Belt of Failure by being unable to stay in jail long enough for FOX News to cover his plight.

His latest attempt to snag the nation's attention has been to lead a series of sparsely attended protests against Barack Obama's planned commencement speech at Notre Dame on May 17th. This past weekend Keyes achieved a rare victory when he was successfully arrested for trespassing, but the celebration was cut brutally short when an unknown individual bailed him out against his will. WorldNetDaily has the details of the latest indignities inflicted upon the long-suffering semi-politician.

"It was weird, because I said, 'I don't want to leave; I didn't post any bond,'" Keyes explained. "But the police wouldn't let me stay. I asked them, 'Has anyone ever been re-arrested for resisting expulsion?' They laughed, for they had never heard anything like that. It didn't seem like the appropriate time to be engaging in civil disobedience."

Keyes plans on attempting to get himself arrested at least once more before the President's speech this Sunday, and even though his logistics skills are not the sharpest, he hopes to remain incarcerated long enough to at least score a little air time.

1 comment:

  1. In the South, the pineapple is a symbol of hospitality. But in Alan Keyes' hand, it must have a deeper, fuckamoonbatblind significance.