Saturday, June 27, 2009

Kerry working on Palin retort

Senator John Kerry is reportedly holed up in his Massachusetts home with a group of top advisers this weekend in an attempt to come up with a retort with the potential to equal or perhaps even surpass the quip made by Sarah Palin earlier this week regarding the odd shape of his face.

The incredibly lame diss-off began on Wednesday when Kerry, speaking about the disappearance of Mark Sanford, reportedly said "Too bad if a governor had to go missing it couldn't have been the governor of Alaska." Lest anyone miss what he apparently assumed was an obscure reference, he helpfully added "You know, Sarah Palin."

Never one to resist responding to a wisecrack, Palin took the opportunity of a visit with troops in Kosovo to respond with a feeble witticism of her own. “He looked quite frustrated and he looked so sad. I just wanted to reach out to the TV and say: ‘John Kerry, why the long face?’"

"Oh, snap!" exclaimed Kerry upon hearing Palin's comeback. "Sarah Palin really got me with that one. I'm loathe to admit it, but I'll have to give her credit. Sarah Palin's jab was stronger than mine. I particularly admire the way she worked my name right into the joke, rather than tacking it on at the end. I wonder who she's got writing for her."

"The senator is working pretty hard on this," said an aide to Kerry. "He's holed up in his rec-room right now, brainstorming. He's an ambitious man. He wants to come up with something even more memorable than the 'long face' line, or even his own missing governor routine, but I've got to tell you, it's a real minefield. So many things are off limit with Governor Palin - her family, her intellect, her appearance... Right now he's focusing on her frozen tundra. I don't know what he'll end up with, but if I know Senator Kerry, by the 4th of July weekend he's going to have a real zinger."

1 comment:

  1. Kerry should just apologize now for raping her daughter.