Thursday, August 26, 2010

the Mac is back

"I'm happy with the win - we had to do what it takes," John McCain announced to the Arizona Republic shortly after winning the state's Republican primary. By way of explaining his cynical step to the far right, he added "As you know, this is an anti-incumbency environment and I had to prove to the Republican voters of Arizona that I can be the most effective person for them in these very difficult times. So I tell them what they need to hear to cope with the situation. These are simple people and they don't always know what's best for themselves."

"I knew it, I knew it, I knew it," said defeated TEA party favorite J.D. Hayworth. "Sure as eggs is eggs I knew I was right. Just watch, by this weekend, he'll be saying he's never changed."

"Poor old J.D., wrong again by four days," chuckled McCain. "I said that Tuesday night before they'd even finished counting all the votes. The Arizona Republic was trying to twist the story of my campaign into this idea that I'd sacrificed my Maverickness, and that my national image as someone who could reach across the aisle in order to save the Senate from itself was kaput. I told them rather forcefully, I do not buy your friggin storyline that I have changed. I will be the same guy that I have always been. And then I speed dialed Harry Reid and said I was ready to work on comprehensive immigration reform, called Lindsey Graham and said I want to get cranking on climate change, and called President Obama to say the Mac is back. He was on a vacation so I guess I'll have to Tweet him."


  1. What J. D. learned was that Papa Walnuts is what you get when you hybridize a chameleon and a gila monster.

  2. LOL at this post, that picture and Fearguth's comment.