Personal Best

A new survey by Public Policy Polling finds that John Edwards has reached new heights in popularity, with only 15% of North Carolina residents having a favorable opinion of him. Back in May of 2009, Edwards set a record as the most unpopular person ever researched by Public Policy, but the latest poll shave another four points off of his own achievement. "This is a remarkable accomplishment," said Dean Debnam of Public Policy, one that's unlikely to be duplicated anytime soon. "You know the old joke about being less popular than Hitler in London during the Blitz? I'm afraid we've entered that territory. Even Dick Cheney looks down on this guy." "On reflection, I guess it was a real waste of money for me to commission this poll," sighed Edwards. "I was thinking about getting back in the game, maybe moving across the state line and running for governor in South Carolina or something, but I've got to admit that these numbers look pretty bad. The only positive spin I can put on the whole thing is that my insufferable wife Saint Elizabeth has taken a big hit in the poll too, so I won't have to hear all the inane prattling about how much sympathy and support she has for much longer. Heh, heh, you can quote me on that - I'm aiming for 12% popularity by December. I might as well excel at something."