Yo, Massachusetts libs...

I realize that you've got yourself a lousy candidate, but please
get out and vote tomorrow. It's really easy, guys, and the girls
will think you're cool if you get one of those 'I voted' stickers.

Girls, I don't know what to tell you, but I promise that
I will buy you a drink if you come down to Virginia, where
we just proudly put a graduate of Pat Robertson's Regent
University into office while our proud progressives sat
sullenly with their thumbs up their asses bemoaning the fact
that we also had a lousy candidate and the revolution had yet to occur.