Thursday, July 8, 2010

President Steele

Senator McCain. So glad to reach you... Who is this? You don't know who this is? This is your Chairman, that's who this is. Michael Steele... You damn right it's a big fucking deal, you just don't know how big it is. What do I want? I didn't say I wanted anything. Maybe I just want to talk... Uh huh... Uh huh... Well listen here, Senator John McCain, I was thinking about what you said a few days ago... About me. You know, that thing about how maybe I should reassess whether I can still lead the Republican Party as chairman of the RNC... Yeah, that. I've done me some serious reassessing and I think the answer is an unqualified yes. And I think the big question right now is not whether or not I can lead, but whether you and some of the other jokers can follow.

I'm not going anywhere, McCain, not until the spirit moves me. And the spirit will move me, cause I'm going places, baby... No, hell is not on my itinerary at the moment, although I'd highly recommend it to you. I think they've got a discount for seniors.

You know what I'm hearing lately?... Well, you better care. President Steele. That's what I'm hearing... All over, that's where I'm hearing it from, do you not read the papers? Andrew Sullivan and Ann Coulter agree with me about Afghanistan, that's a helluva pair of bookends, ain't it? Ann wrote a column saying that Bill Kristol should resign. Pretty funny, huh? And of course with the right I've got Ron Paul on my side, dude really packs a wallop, so I'm thinking the Tea Party's going to be falling in line. Damn war is expensive, man, bring those troops back and put the money back in people's pockets. And then there's about 80% of the Democrats who agree with me. Poor folks, they voted for change and they just got more of an endless war... Uh huh... Uh huh... You're a little senile, McCain, you just have trouble latching on to new ideas, I guess.

I'm the maverick, now. I was just walking along, minding my own business, and I found this maverick title lying in the road. Some crazy old fool just tossed it away. Who knows why. Anyway, it was pretty beat up and tarnished but I took it home and it's starting to look like new. People sure do like a maverick.

Whoa, you've got a pretty nasty mouth on you, McCain, hope nobody was recording that... Heh heh, just playing with you, but you've got to be careful about what you say... Me? You're wrong, man, I'm always careful about what I say. Maybe it sounds like I'm floundering cause you don't know how to listen... Again with that mouth. You better be careful, Senator, you're going to give yourself a heart attack.

Yeah, I'm crazy all right. Politico says I'm crazy like a fox... That's right. Roger Simon, today. He says when you look at me, you aren't seeing a man wildly blundering, you're seeing a man running for president... That's not bullshit, man, you can't tell shit from shinola. Like he says, if I was the nominee, I'd end up getting most of the Republican votes anyway, plus I'd take a lot of the black vote away from Obama, and then there's all those anti-war votes just waiting for someone to call them in. Sounds like a plan, what you think?... Heh heh heh, you sure as heck are one x-rated geezer, McCain, if you could campaign like you cuss, you'd be on your way to a second term... Heh heh heh, fuck you too, Senator, it's been a pleasure talking to you.


  1. Steele. What a great guy!

    John who?

  2. Mussolini may not be Hitler, but that doesn't mean Il Duce's....good Similarly for the Real Mike Steele and McCaint (a twisted little man who will be sinkin' into Hades, soon). Steele sounds about like Aynnie Rand did in 60s-- This 'Nam thing's costin' us an arm and a leg... But he makes some of the moderate neo-cons cream (like Aynnie ooo Steele)