"Hey, Frothy Boy, over here! No, not over there, over here. What are you, deaf?"
"Hi, I'm Rick Santorum. Glad that you could make it today."
"No problem. You didn't mind me callin you Frothy Boy, did ya? It's a little joke me and my bud Jake came up with."
"Well, it's pretty darn clever. No, Mitt Romney might object to a little good natured humor like that, but not me."
"Why the hell would I call Mitt Romney Frothy Boy? That wouldn't make sense. We call Mitt Romney 'Cheetos', cause he looks like the kinda guy who wouldn't eat one."
"Oh, I get it. So you call me Frothy Boy because I look like the kind of guy who would never..."
"Nah, it doesn't always work that way. Anyhow, I just wanted to come down here today and shake your hand. I feel like I owe you a big debt of gratitude."
"Well that's just great. I'm glad my message resonates with you."
"Goddamn if that ain't some real Frothy Boy talk. But you're right. My old lady Sheila and I were talkin yesterday bout what you said bout college, and you nailed it. She said 'that Santorum motherfucker's got it right, why should we work our asses off so our boys can go to some snooty ass college where they can get all bamboozled by liberals? If they do end up makin something out of themselves, they're just goin to end up lookin down their nose at us.' We don't need that shit."
"I'm not sure that's the right way to look at it..."
"Course it is. Thanks to you we're lookin at a week in Vegas. You know, Sheila's parents saved all their money so they could send her to a fancy ass college, and all she did was party and get herself pregnant. Well, I helped, but still, only use she ever got out of it was to get drunk sometimes and shoot her mouth about somethin useless. What the hell you suppose to do with political science anyway?"
"I... I don't know."
"Me neither! Sheila neither!"
"Well, I'm glad you could make it here today, and I hope that I can count on your vote."
"Hell no, Rick, you ain't gonna find me anywhere near a voting booth. I know a couple voters, and believe you me, those people is some real snobs, walking around with their little 'I just voted' stickers like they was something special. I'm not gonna lower myself to their level, no way."
"Okay, then... Enjoy the rally."
"Gotta run, Frothy Boy, just stopped by to say thanks. I'm headin up town to see Cheetos - he's got Kid Rock tonight."
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