Exclusive!

"I'm Megyn Kelly and I'm back now with a FOX News exclusive here at America's News Room. Joining us now on the screen is President Asif Zardari of Pakistan, a man who I loathe having to interview again.  President Zardari, I want to start right out with a very important question - how did you get hold of my private cell phone number?"   "What? No warm greetings? You're not going to ask me how I've been doing since we last met?"   "We've never met. I interviewed you one time by satellite. How did you get my number?"   "Oh, it was quite simple. Pakistan's Inter-Services Intelligence Agency is the finest in the world. And don't try changing your number on me again, Megyn Kelly. That makes them very sad."   "Sorry if I hurt your intelligence agency's feelings, President Zardari, but I want you to stop harassing me."   "I accept your apology, it is most gracious. Now, why would you contend that I am harassing you?"   "The constant call and emails, for one thing, along with the endless barrage of flowers and Tiffany's trinkets. Why are you doing this?"   "Well, after our last meeting..."   "Interview. Satellite interview."   "Whatever you wish. You will find that I am not such a bad guy. After our last interview, my intelligence service revealed that you were quite enthralled by me. They said you seemed to come alive whenever I spoke. Asif, my friends would say, I believe that you have a hot one."   "You're intelligence service is wrong, and you don't have a hot one. I'm a married woman."   "You know, sometimes in Pakistan a married woman will..."   "Stop it right there."   "Forgive me, Megyn Kelly. I have many lonely nights. I myself am no longer married... although I used to be."   "Sorry."   "Do you know what happened to my wife?"   "Of course I do. Everybody knows what happened to Benazir Bhutto. It was tragic."   "Tragic enough to soften your heart, Megyn Kelly?"   "No. Let's move on. What is your reaction to the Obama administration suspending and in some cases canceling millions of dollars in aid to the Pakistan military."   "It is quite unfortunate that it has happened and I feel very badly about it, but not as bad as I feel about losing your affection... You are not going to react, Megyn Kelly? No? Ah, well. We were counting on getting some new artillery with that aid, but I do read the papers so I understand what is going on."   "You understand the need for Pakistan to be a better ally when it comes to fighting terror emanating from it's own borders?"   "Heavens no. I understand that the United States is in the midst of a financial meltdown. Perhaps you do not report on that story there on foxy news."   "It's FOX news, not foxy news."   "During the times when you are on, I believe I am the one who is correct. At any rate, with your country now facing such a fiscal disaster..."   "And we do report  it. Relentlessly."   "I can imagine you reporting it no other way, Megyn Kelly. Still, money is tight, so I can understand why you would need to save a little by depriving us of a few bucks to fight terrorism."   "It's not a few bucks, it's eight hundred million."   "A trifle in a big economy like Pakistan's. And yet, even in it's time of hardship, your country is still big hearted enough to give us a billion and change. So I hope that you, Megyn Kelly, are big hearted enough to give me one of your smiles."   "You don't seem to understand that neither this country nor myself are interested in a relationship with you."   "You might not want it, but perhaps you need it."   "Stop leering at me."    "Easy for you to say, but that would be like trying to stop foreign terrorists from operating within Pakistani borders. Sometimes when your heart tells you..."   "That's enough, President Zardari. We're done here. And I vow that I will never interview you again."   "Good idea, Megyn Kelly, this is far too formal. Next time let's meet at a cafe and just talk."

Exlusive!

"I'm Megan Kelly and I'm back now with a FOX News exclusive. Joining us now on the screen is President Asif Zardari of Pakistan.  President Zardari, I want to start out by saying how awesome it is that you chose to do your first interview since the killing of Osama bin Laden on my show."   "Thank you very much. My intelligence informs me that with the departure of Katy Couric you are now America's Sweetheart."   "Your intelligence services are apparently more reliable than a lot of politicians are saying right now."   "They have been wrong at times in the past, but sometimes they knock it out of the park. I thought it of utmost importance that my first interview be with a sweetheart."   "I may be a sweetheart but I can also be tough, as you'll see by my first question. President Zardari, how could Osama bin Laden live for at least six years in a major Pakistan city without being detected?"   "Wow, that is a tough question, much as you forewarned, but since you are also fair and balanced, I will not hesitate to answer. The truth is that it is just one of those things."   "Just one of those things? But he lived in a huge house."   "Large, yes, but I wouldn't call it huge. You should see my place. As a matter of fact, I will extend an invitation here and now for the very next time you're in Islamabad."   "President Zardari, please stop leering at me."   "I cannot help myself, Megan Kelly. Your hair is like spun gold and you have many other remarkable assets as well."   "Back to bin Laden's compound... You're saying that no one was suspicious, even though it had fourteen foot high walls topped with barbed wire?"   "The general consensus is that it was just someone who liked their privacy. Pakistan is a privacy loving nation. Perhaps you would like me to invade your privacy, Megan Kelly."   "Stop it. There's an growing number of people who are saying that you intentionally overlooked bin Laden for years so that you could continue to collect the billions in military support aid. I'm one of the people saying it."   "That saddens me, Megan Kelly. It's lonely at the top."   "These same people are calling for a complete end to future aid to Pakistan." "I must admit that is worrisome. Congressman Ted Poe introduced such a bill today in your House, and my intelligence service assures me that he is one of the most powerful people in Washington. I don't care about the money but I would hate to lose the weapons. I love American weapons... It appears as though you are equipped with a pair of strategic American warheads yourself, Megan Kelly."    "That's it. The interview is over."   "Wonderfully done. Perhaps you would like my email address before I go."