 Special thanks to Brady Bonk of Ketchup is a Vegetable, who put together the Zappadan Tweeter Network, and posted many fine Zappadan contributions. Special thanks to Blue Gal, at her own blog as well as at Crooks & Liars for spreading the word far and wide, and also too, for her own excellent contributions. Special thanks to Zen Comix for bringing us Frank both in Spirit and in spirit. Special thanks to Urantian Sojourn who I've quite rightly dubbed the Poet Laureates of Zappadan, Mock, Paper, Scissors for constant creativity and support, and not to be redundant although indeed I am, the ultra-mysterious darkblack for constant creativity and support. And still there's more. In my very best approximation of alphabetical order, Special thanks for the special contributions from 3C Patent Law, 68comeback special, After The Bridge, alicia policia, Alternate Brain, A Modified Dog, The Anchovy Daiquiri Shack, The Brain Police, Bildungblog, Blckdgrd, Contingencies, The Culture Ghost, Dave Knows Portland, Freida Bee, From Laurel Street, Illiterate Electorate, I Painted My Fridge Red, Iranianredneck, Like Dancing About Architecture, Loud Mouth Soup, Luiz Woodstock, Mad Dog Media, MF Blog, Mikeb302000, News Hounds, Ornery Bastard, Outside the Interzone, Progressive Alaska, Pushing Rope, Rawrahs, Salmon Alley, ShortWoman, Skippy the Bush Kangaroo, The Adventures of Zevo Calamari & Boo, The Aristocrats, The Guys From Area 51, The Jade Gate, Tiny Little Circles, Uncommon Squalor, Under the Lobsterscope, Welcome to Pottersville 2, Wetmachine, Wisdom of the West, hair of the dog from driftglass, and anyone else I've inadvertently missed. MERRY ZAPPADAN! ...and one more thing - hit it, Theodore! |
 How ya doin', Mr Buchanan? Long time, no see. You want me to set you up with one of your Thorogood specials? |
 Not tonight, Joe. Just a cup of coffee with a little Irish in it. I was just stopping by in hopes that Frank Zappa might show up again this year... |
 Hadn't seen him since Zappadan last year, Mr Buchanan. And the only other time was back in '93. He's kinda like Haley's Comet. Funny thing is, those are the only two times you've ever been in here, other than tonight. You two don't have some sort of weird karmic connection thing going on, do you? |
| Me and Frank? Nah, I don't think so. I mean, probably not... But then, it is a little strange the way our paths have crossed. Maybe I'll take off my jacket and wait a while, just in case... |
meanwhile, at the Utility Muffin Research Kitchen... Come on, Gail, let me outta here! I'm so hungry I could eat your cooking. |
 Here's a couple of Slim Jims, Frank, but that's all you're getting until you find something worth releasing in your enormous archives. |
| If it was worth releasing I probably already would have released it when I was alive. Oh man... Look at all these tapes... Maybe I can hobble together a Lost Episodes, volume 2. |
| I heard that, Frank. I want something with conceptual continuity. Now get to work. |
and up in Rock & Roll  Man, I sure do envy Frank, getting to walk among the living for most of December. I wonder how he managed to swing that deal. |
 I think it's like some kinda curse or something, Jimi. I was talkin to him one time and he told me that the modern day composer wasn't allowed to die. |
 That must be a new rule that didn't go into effect until after we were already here. Jeez, this place is boring. I'd pay a fortune right now for a cold beer. |
 Here you go, sir, one icy cold Miller Lite in a can. And there's no charge, Mr Morrison. Your money is no good here. |
| That's fortunate, because I wouldn't pay a nickel for this swill. Fucking Robert Novak... Jeez, this place is boring. I'd pay a fortune right now for a glass of Jack Daniels. |
 Here you go, honey. Grab yourself a big old swig off of my Southern Comfort. |
| Get outta here. That sweet shit makes me wanna puke. Fucking Janis Joplin... You know, I'd pay a fortune for... |
 Would you kindly just shut the hell up? All you old rock stars do is sit around pissing and moaning. |
| Who you calling an old rock star, punk? And as I recall, pissing and moaning seemed to have been a specialty of yours. |
 Heh heh, you just got flamed by the King, Kurt. |
| Excuse me, but will some tell me how it is that Joey Ramone is even technically qualified to be here in Rock and Roll Purgatory? |
| He is dead and he is here. Ergo, ipso facto. |
| Shut up and get me another beer, Novak. You know, that's one of the things that I like about Rock and Roll Purgatory. The quality might not be anything to write home about, but you can eat and drink all you want without getting fat. |
| Amen to that, brother. But I gotta say, I think that this place makes a pretty good cheeseburger. |
| But I don't want a cheeseburger. I just want a little time to walk the earth like Frank Zappa does. |
 You know, Kurt, things may not be the way that you're imagining them. I think Elvis had it right. It may be more of a curse. You ever notice how happy Frank always seems when he gets back here? |
 Yes indeed, Brother John. Whatcha think the story is with that? |
| Well, there's not really a lot of people that care about our music anymore. Oh sure, there's a lot of people who remember caring about it. A little nostalgia for the old folks, Frank called it. |
| John is right. My last record didn't sell shit even when I died. People wanted to hear the hits like 'Beat on the Brat' and 'I Want to be Sedated'. |
| I don't know what you're talking about, son, but it sure sounds like the truth to me. People be coming to my shows and yelling for 'Sex Machine', and I'm like, Damn! I'm 73 years old! |
| Yeah, and there's the whole family thing to deal with. If I were to return, I imagine Yoko would have me shut away trying to help her on some project or another, and I'll bet Courtney is the same way. |
| Dig it. It wouldn't surprise me a bit to find out that Frank's wife has him locked up in the studio going through that enormous archive of his. You guys wanna jam? |
| I... I think I'll have that cheeseburger now. |
| One cheeseburger, coming right up. Another beer, Mr Morrison? |
| Back at Joe's...Look at the time, will you? I've got to do 'Morning Joe' in the morning, Joe, so I guess I better get ready to go. How much do I owe, Joe? |
| Two coffees with Irish... That'll be twelve bucks, Mr Buchanan. Sorry that your friend didn't show up tonight. |
My friend? I guess he's not really my friend... Just a man who changed my life. Merry Zappadan, Joe. |
 Interesting character, that Buchanan. I thought you knew him, Thedy Sue. You should have joined him for a holiday drink. |
 I've met him a couple times, Joe, but he seemed a little preoccupied tonight. Hey, you've got another customer that just walked in. |
| How you doing tonight, Mr Zappa? Your wife finally let you out of the house? |
 Sure did, Joe. I found some out-takes and backing tracks from '73 and '74 that she can try and sell as 'Over-Nite Apostrophe'. I tell you, Joe, this walking the earth stuff isn't all it's cracked up to be. |
| I hear you, pal. So what can I fix you up with tonight, Mr Zappa? |
| I've just got enough time left for one of your world famous rib-eyes, Joe, extra bloody. |
You got it, pal. On the house. |
 Brady at Ketchup is a Vegetable does an excellent roundup of highlights from this years Zappadan, while the ultra-mysterious darkblack presents the 'Black Page' along with a list of this year's Zappadan performers (ready for you to bookmark). The invaluable Blue Gal brings us some ZappaCakes that she obtained at the bakery of alicia policia. I Painted My Fridge Red shares memories, bildungblog completes his '18 days of Zappadan', The Brain Police tells us about his first time. Progressive Alaska joins in with Zappa conducting Ravel's Bolero, Alternate Brain features 'Excentrifigul Forz', Welcome to Pottersville tells us 'Jesus Still Thinks You're a Jerk', Under the Lobsterscope celebrates with 'Blessed Relief', Mock, Paper, Scissors brings us the great Crossfire debate, Iranianredneck has 'Uncle Remus'. Update: Loud Mouth Soup brings 'Florentine Pogen', Mock, Paper, Scissors hears from John Lofton. Update 2: Urantian Sojourn illustrates and addresses The Central Scrutinizer' Update 3: The Aristocrats await th Great Barking Pumpkin. Zappadan Facebook and Zappadan Twitter. |
| Skippy the bush kangaroo has the legendary Steve Allen bicycle tapes, Under the Lobsterscope has The Illinois Enema Bandit, bildungblog has The Baltimore Zappa Bust, Mikeb302000 has Hungry Freaks Daddy, Tiny Little Circles has Ed Palermo and Zappa's Univers, A Modified Dog writes about not writing about Zappadan, The Brain Police writes about Sugarcane Harris and has video of Centerville from 200 Motels, Mock Paper Scissors has wisdom, and Urantian Sojourn has toast.  Zappadan Facebook and Zappadan Twitter. |
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